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Apples Or Oranges?

April 4, 2018

Apples or Oranges? Life is full of choices. You make them all day long, some without even thinking. From the moment you wake up and open your eyes, you have to decide if you’re even going to get out of bed.

Now you may be thinking, that’s silly, but it’s true. Many of our decisions aren’t even consciously thought out. It’s as if our bodies are on autopilot and someone how programmed us.

I want to challenge this thought. The one thing we can control is the choices we make. We can’t control what has happened to us but we can control the choices we make and what we focus on. What they mean and what we are going to do moving forward. The action we can take to meet our goal.

When I became a single mom, as devastated as I was, I had a choice to make. Was I going to cry and whine about my husband who did all these horrible things to cause the break-up of our family? Whether they were true or not, I had a choice as to how I perceived my current situation.

No, it wasn’t what I wanted.  I believed in white picket fences, two kids, a dog and happily ever after.

My children were what helped me make wise choices. How is that, your thinking? They were 9 and 13 years old at the time. They were just kids. Yes, but I had a goal. I knew what I wanted. You see, when my first daughter was born I had hopes and dreams to give her love and a solid foundation with which she could then flourish in her adulthood. The break-up of my family put those hopes and dreams on rocky ground. My world had been turned upside down. My dream was shattered. How was I going to accomplish this alone?

One choice at a time. With each choice, I filtered it through the lens of, was this going to help me reach my goal?  The goal of raising strong, independent and loving young women.

This helped me with how I spent my time and money. I had just turned 40 years old. I hadn’t even hit my peak yet. Surely, I should be going out looking for a new man. NOT! My time was precious. there was not enough of it as it was, I wasn’t going to waste it. I would rather spend my time investing in my daughters. That would help me get to my goal.

Don’t get me wrong, I was lonely at times. I did spend time with other women that were in my situation, so we could support one another. There were occasions that I got to go out and laugh and play. I needed to build in some time for me to be Annie not just Mom.

Decisions produce destiny. Get clear on the vision you have for your family and take action every day, one tiny step at a time toward your dream.